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tornadoday

~ …might I be found in words I leave behind

tornadoday

Monthly Archives: May 2014

your only wish ~

30 Friday May 2014

Posted by tornadoday in a time for telling, Poetry

≈ 15 Comments

Tags

bliss, breath, conscious consciousness, faith, grace, gravel roads, knowledge, life, love, nature, old maps, passion, poetry, reason, sacred intimacy, spirit, truth, understanding, wisdom

leaningin

blues
and purple clover
spilled beneath my skirt
as intimate
the weave
of earth to sky
rings of more
than one could keep
a memory of light
– lacey pieces
scattered on the lawn

time
revealing everything
we never meant to say
and yet
for this –
I sit so long the night
wrapped within
your only wish –
once before was fell
to where I wait
in shadows
of your sleep

breathing
eased
before the dew
can rise again
to wing
before the cricket’s song
the swallow sings
of heaven
o thy sleepy eyes
speak so lovingly
of ancient rite
and nights
of evergreen

. . .

nmw ~

29 Thursday May 2014

Posted by tornadoday in a time for telling, Poetry, Rambling

≈ 8 Comments

Tags

assurance, belonging, connection, faith, family, fearless, forgiveness, grace, home, knowledge, life, love, old maps, passion, reason, relationship, southern, spirit, spirituality, strength, truth, two the same, understanding, value, wisdom

Recently, a few friends and I were sharing concern for another – one who seems to struggle from time to time, and who, as a rule, is surrounded by drama. In developing a plan to help, we lamented over possible causes. For surely, any work on a fix without understanding seemed futile.

At one point, my sister brought to attention something we had not considered.nearertoheaven

He has a great job, and a great wife. I’m sure he has many friends, but I wonder how strong the nets.

The result was a discussion about ‘no matter what’ relationships; those that endure regardless of time, circumstance, or the number of times someone says (or doesn’t say) “I love you”. I reflected that I have numerous friends, and we each depend on the assurance of our friendship – one that ‘you couldn’t mess up if you wanted to’. My sister calls those the ‘end of the day’ anchors – the knowledge that regardless of what the day brings, at the end of the day, we have each other. I’m one of her anchors, and she one of mine.

Later, when I thought about this, I realized the worth of that talk in helping our friend.

At the same time, I realized I’ve never been without such anchors; so that it is somewhat difficult for me to imagine an existence without them. And yet, my students struggle with something as simple as providing references, because they’ve burned all those bridges, and in some cases, severed the cords that tied them to love and a ‘no matter what’ place.

For those without such assurance, I can only imagine the feeling of loss. But then again, how do you miss something you never had?

I’ve long suspected drama as a means for pulling people to you (even if unintentional). Maybe, at our core, we do realize something is missing; we just don’t have a name for it.

I think I was like most kids growing up, in that I saw every family the same as mine. It was not until much later that I found that not to be the case. I recall a friend whose parents were divorced, and I envied her freedoms. Not until recently did I learn how she envied me for having parents who worried when I was late, someone whose permission I needed ask. My friend – she’s another ‘no matter what – end of day’ part of all I know of truth.  Attachment?  You bet.  ❤

Even now, if leaving my parents for home, I call to report when I’ve arrived safely. The anchor they provided me is the same one I offer them now. Not a day starts for me without a text from my brother and my sisters….a reminder of what I know already – that I am loved – no matter what.

Take away my clothing, my earrings, my favorite homemade apple butter.  Take it all, and still I am rich, for that which simply is, that which waits while I sleep.

Without these scarlet cords, what would I be? A ship in the darkness, a kite without a tender hand to guide.

whatever this
a stillness warmed
by all I know to be –
words are not yet formed
for love I feel
floats within
these precious seas
tis more to breath
than blood –
more to fate than scars
a lantern held aloft
beside the stars

. . .

in search of beginning ~

28 Wednesday May 2014

Posted by tornadoday in Poetry

≈ 12 Comments

Tags

conscious consciousness, faith, fearless, forgiveness, grace, gravel roads, life, living, love, passion, reason, relationship, soul, spirit, truth, understanding

reminders

I’ve wandered the past
in search of beginning
and asked of myself
what you knew
never told

how long
might forever
be weighted by reason
and where are the answers
I left by the gate

tied by intention –
the burden of faith

surely the soul
is permitted another
surrender –
the color
I knew by your name

. . .

unnoticed ~

27 Tuesday May 2014

Posted by tornadoday in a time for telling, Poetry

≈ 11 Comments

Tags

becoming, connection, conscious consciousness, death, destiny, dreams, faith, fearless, grace, gravel roads, life, living, love, memory, old maps, passion, reason, sacred intimacy, spirit, spirituality, truth, understanding, wandering, wisdom

almostalwayshome

of saturdays
to notice –
the way I feel for you
has never changed
the angle of the sun
where flowers gather fragrance
near the dusted road –
where wings have spread
a canopy divine

a swarm of song
each thought becomes
a parting just as dear –
returning
nimble briars unto spring
berries crushed beneath us –
a favored lullaby
is whispered without word
above the pines

answers
I’ve been weaving back
into the first I knew
moments casting shadows on the night
seeking recognition
of pages yet unturned –
an ancient quest
with nothing left
to rhyme

last I dreamed
for more than this –
some absolute of life
where golden sat
the moon
beside the barn
seasons went unnoticed –
one and still you are
a welcome home
remembered –
every time

. . .

of touch ~

25 Sunday May 2014

Posted by tornadoday in a time for telling, Poetry

≈ 7 Comments

Tags

breath, connection, conscious consciousness, dreams, faith, grace, gravel roads, knowledge, life, love, memory, old maps, passion, poetry, reason, spirit, star crossed, strength, truth, understanding, wandering, wonder

windows12

what ways
have i forgotten –
all i wanted once to be
how sweet
the smell of wonder
after rain

the almost was
is folded
to places i am one
recalled to love
by echoes of
my name

held within
a stolen breath
as promise without place
another time –
yet still
the heart retains

a moment unforgotten
of all i knew
to be
an essence
left by longing –
a memory of flame

. . .

story ~

25 Sunday May 2014

Posted by tornadoday in a time for telling, Rambling, Storytelling

≈ 4 Comments

Tags

angels, children, community, compassion, connection, conscious consciousness, divine responsibility, faith, fearless, forgiveness, grace, knowledge, life, living, love, mental illness, questions, reason, relationship, restless, self, society, solutions, spirit, spirituality, tears, truth, understanding, value

nearlyhomeIt seems as late, I am compelled to writing stories. Maybe it’s the look in my daddy’s eyes when he’s telling me something I didn’t know already, or maybe I’m coming to understand that it’s something I do well, and that poetry need not be lost in the process.

I’ve discovered is that I don’t need to create an imaginary world to write. I have the world already, and stories that I’ve often worried to – that they would disappear completely if someone (if I) didn’t write them down.

You see, I love the story. I want to know the why of everything. I refuse to chalk off violence or ignorance as just poor breeding or insufficient laws. It’s impossible to ever truly understand, to truly know compassion if you don’t know the story of how someone (anyone) got to the place they are, how they come to a crossroads where the choices were so blurry (and perhaps so few).  I want to know because every story is in some part my own.

Do I know you?

I watch the news and hear the latest details of a killing, a beating, a thoughtless remark…….and know there’s more to the story – a betrayal, a loss, an act that seems beyond reach of forgiveness. And yet, as a rule, society cares not much for the why; with most attention focused on who – who can we blame? Maybe if we spent a little more time understanding, there would be less that needed fixing. If our sympathies extended beyond others just like ourselves, then maybe we could become part of something more than a temporary distraction – a moment of outrage.

A moment beyond the moment in which we’ve forgotten.

I will listen.

Instead, reporters tell us the same thing over and over (we must have someone to blame). We hurt for the victims of senseless violence, and yet cannot see that we are all victims. Most perpetrators have family, people who love them, people who will struggle with survival in the world of ‘after’. Do we grieve for them, or are we much more selective with our compassion, identifying only with the survivors we recognize? Do we grieve for the soul that was so lost as to think this was really an answer?

Who let go?

It makes us angry, when it should make us sad. “Every man’s death diminishes me.” Every story becomes a part of my own, every sorrow, a memory mine.

which way
the beginning –
was a moment in time
when love
found a way
through the dark
forsaken the promise
would take them to home
and a light
on the porch
burning still

walking and wearing
boots into dust
the wringing of wrinkled
these hands
are emptied by losing
each innocence come –
by way of the path
we’ve forgotten
to watch

. . .

by visions into light ~

24 Saturday May 2014

Posted by tornadoday in Poetry

≈ 10 Comments

Tags

breath, cherokee, conscious consciousness, dreams, faith, fearless, grace, gravel roads, home, knowledge, life, love, old maps, passion, reason, seeing in the dark, soul, spirit, touch, truth, understanding, wandering

comingnow

beyond the longest shadow
a sense of something more
– a night
here I have wandered
(fearlessly)

to distant meadows
(blooming)
grass stains
on my toes
(a ways) beyond
the only path I know

houses where
(the lowly) I
was cradled tenderly
a yard is overgrown
(but I don’t care)

tis not my want
to question –
when wishing me to home
dreams are come
(and I am)
everywhere

a deeper trust
divided
(by visions) into light
hearts are one
(tho all the proof is gone)

what of me (another)
remembers where to go

when once (as then)
my sleeping ends –
miles from this I dream
familiar lives
reclaiming (now)
my soul

. . .

fragile joy ~

24 Saturday May 2014

Posted by tornadoday in Poetry

≈ 12 Comments

Tags

bliss, connection, conscious consciousness, divine this, dreams, faith, forgiveness, grace, gravel roads, knowledge, love, old maps, one, passion, reason, relationship, spirit, spirituality, truth, understanding, wisdom, wonder

going

as silent hands
remember touch –
a fragile cup of joy
as carried once
across the depths
of time

reminders
of each sorrow
held us near to love
treasure
far too sweet
for one to hold

in seasons of
together
from close – a distance none
is lost to these
who gave of light
away

beyond the knowing
meant for sight
a truth that needs
not seed
I carry still
another me somehow

conceived
of something greater
than want
to understand
how fleeting
we –
a moment saved
to love

. . .

breathless ~

18 Sunday May 2014

Posted by tornadoday in Poetry

≈ 10 Comments

Tags

bliss, breath, connection, conscious consciousness, dreams, fearless, knowledge, living, love, memory, old maps, passion, poetry, seeing in the dark, spirituality, value, wisdom, wonder

disappearing

stardust
was the first I knew
of midnight confidantes –
prints along
the edges
of my room

verses
found in corners
words I never used –
poems sweetly tucked
into the night

breathless
as a robin’s first
warms the window sill
– what proof
has been forsaken
to the dark

blushing hands
resist the fault
of memory to plead
swollen lips –
the taste of honeybees

a curs’ed line
runs parallel
to places I am still
– gathered as a wish
into a sigh

. . .

sand that would be sea ~

15 Thursday May 2014

Posted by tornadoday in a time for telling, Poetry, Rambling

≈ 12 Comments

Tags

becoming, breath, destiny, dreams, faith, fearless, grace, knowledge, life, love, memory, old maps, passion, reason, restless, spirituality, truth, understanding, value, wandering, wisdom, wonder

whereand stillsometimes
the path beginning
seems distant from the start
but still the sun
familiar shadows fall
along the ways
we came before
another day of light
reminders of our passage
thru the dark

beneath a shelf
where heaven knew
each step before we took
a choice of paths
with nothing
save the moon
forgave our sole allegiance
would find a way to love
revealing what of here
was yesterday

in stories
started over
might a hero hesitate
as destinies rewritten
by promise come too late

ten thousand lives
a million miles
o’er sand that would be sea
returning us – a stranger
to the one
we came to be

were all our plans
decided
by choices long ago
so different this –
our journey never done
remains of us a setting
familiar as the first
– a breath away
from living
just begun

. . .

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